December 2011
1 post
October 2011
2 posts
“Al Sharpton wanted to interview me. Yeah, Al Sharpton. But I said, ‘No, I...”
– Guy on the train last week
September 2011
7 posts
1 tag
shorturl:
here is a judgemental lamp
http://news.yahoo.com/office-depot-fires-exec-impro... →
August 2011
11 posts
hyliam:
HEY lil mama lemma whisper in your ear!
tell u somethin u might like to hear
u gota zabity zoom dip doodley and yo ass look soft
mind if i zip zop zoobity bop and see if it’s zop
Me: [walking back into the house] Of course I forgot something. That's my middle name.
My father: You forgot your middle name?
The scene: My mother lost her cellphone. She knew she had it before she went to my aunt’s house, and that the next day it was gone.
She walks into the house. To my father:
“Wait a minute, I had a thought. Remember yesterday, at Sue’s house, when I got Splenda in my purse, so I emptied out everything into the garbage?”
4 tags
Three Essays on the Theory of Sexuality by Sigmund...
quicksummary:
Yo dawg I heard you like your mom, so I put your mom in your car so you can have sex with her while she’s your mom.
3 tags
Baby, It's Cold Outside
quicksummary:
“I have to go.”
“Don’t go, I want to have sex with you.”
“Okay.”
July 2011
2 posts
“One of the things you learn as a college president is that if an undergraduate...”
– Former Harvard president Larry Summers, on the Winklevoss twins
January 2011
8 posts
“Oh, do you get scared easily? Did you have a nightmare? Was your daddy in it?”
– Lady at the gym, after she tapped me on the shoulder and I jumped a little
wouldn't be the first time →
The book I’m ordering for the library right now is written by an Adriaen Van Der Donck.
New nickname for future boyfriend, Y/Y?
Countdown to the Seventh Anniversary of TORQUE
wondertonic:
January 16th marks the 7th anniversary of the release of the greatest motorcycle racing film ever: TORQUE. Use this page to easily track the time until the big day and learn interesting facts about TORQUE.
From WikiTorque:
“On January 4th, 2011, Wondertonic.com started a countdown to the 7th anniversary of the film’s release date. The sites creator, Mike Lacher, was...
December 2010
20 posts
The writer of this book I’m cataloguing is named Susan Kaiser Greenland.
If I were her, I’d just drop the first name.
Kaiser Greenland.
Boss.
"Mario Lopez and Paris Hilton in 'The Dog Who...
mariskahargitay:
Wuht.
I looked it up. This is, apparently, a real thing.
Failed picks for the "use a movie title to...
mariskahargitay:
There Will Be Blood
12 Angry Men
Mommy Dearest
Avatar
The Elephant Man
Human Centipede
Jaws
The Quick and the Dead
Garfield
Selena
Play CRISIS: DONUT
wondertonic:
The internet’s most gripping game.
The "Oh My God Guys, I Can't Believe Senior Year...
wondertonic:
Promise we’ll stay in touch after graduation. Promise.
fmylife:
Today, I decided to take a nap in the university library. I felt like I’d only closed my eyes for a minute, when a random guy woke me up to tell me that I’d been farting in my sleep for the last half hour, and that the librarian was becoming concerned. FML
Watchwondertonic:
CAUTION! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT!
